Just great

Barry Bonds hit a 400 foot laser last night for his 741st career home run. He's 14 shy of Hank Aaron's 755 record. There's a lot of flap about Bonds not deserving such a hallowed mark since anyone with an ounce of common sense knows he used performance enhancing drugs.

I don’t respect guys who take short cuts or their achievements, however, Bonds is just one player in a league full of cheaters. The pitchers are on steroids, or HGH, or whatever, just the same as Bonds.

Yeah, it's true the faster the pitch the further the hit. But it's also true that the faster the pitch the tougher it is to make contact.

Aaron set the mark for his day and age.

Unfortunately, Bonds will set the mark for ours.

Cheaters suck.

McEwen - 300/ Haedo + 470

I'm sure something like that is going to be out there if JJ Haedo makes CSC's Tour de France squad, and man, I would love to get down on the money line for Haedo winning the green jersey. His freaking lead out man is going to be none other than Paris/Roubaix winner Stuart O'Grady! Before O'Grady rocked the cobbles Sunday he and Haedo were in CA for our little bike race. On the stage finishing in Sacramento, O'Grady led out Haedo from so far back I couldn't see where the lead out began from my vantage point at the finish line. And on the TV coverage, O'Grady and Haedo just appear on screen out of nowhere making everyone else look like they're standing still. O'Grady blew past Luca Paolini, Thor Hushovd and George Hincapie before dropping Haedo off with less than 200 to go. It was text book. At the line Haedo had put five bike lenghts on Paolini and seven or so on Thor.

Granted, that was the Tour of California. Even if Haedo makes the TDF squad he still has to finish the race for a degenerate like me to cash in on his efforts. It's a big risk to bet that a sprinter who was racing in North America last year will make it through the mountains to the Champs d Elysee. But still, with O'Grady as his lead out man, Haedo winning the green is an attractive proposition. I haven't bet on bike racing, yet, but I do have some experience with football. I'd guess McEwen would be the favorite somewhere around bet $300 to win $100. That'd put Haedo, who's probably low- to mid-pack among green jersey contenders, somewhere around bet $100 to win $470.

Great odds, just need to find a book.

Bran muffins for breakfast

I'm a pretty regular guy who likes a regular routine. I wave hi on my way to work each day to the same neighbors taking a walk. I park in the same spot on the 4th floor of the city garage. But today marks the first unnerving occasion concerning my morning routine. Every day about a half hour before lunch I grab the sports page and take a trip to the reading room. All this week I've been sharing the library with a man on my floor who has to be in his seventies. I'm sorry but something ruins a soon to be middle aged guy's most peaceful part of the day when there's a septugenarian nearby who's on the same bodily function schedule. I guess all that's left for me to look forward to now is moving my office closer to the end of the hall in case of emergencies.

Publicity hounds and media jackals

Listed among the Bay Area events reporters may want to cover today is the US citizenship ceremony where Odessa Gunn, wife of "famed cyclist Levi Leipheimer," will become a naturalized citizen. The 10 a.m. ceremony is in SF at the Masonic Auditorium and "reporters interested in interviewing Gunn should arrive at 9:30 a.m."

Sharon Rummery is the contact for the event. Typically the contact is a public relations person.

I'll try to refrain as much as possible from asking questions on this blog without at least providing some half-baked answer, but in this case I don't understand the overall PR angle.

Is this the work of Levi's PR folks keeping Levi's name in the news and bolstering his image as a Bay Area celebrity in a run up to what will hopefully be Levi's fantastic run in this year's Tour de France?

Is Odessa making a PR run herself, a la Spice Beckham, prior to launching a line of clothes, fragrances, etc.?

Maybe someone in the cycling community can help me see the overall picture here.

In totally unrelated news, there's a front page story in today's Wall Street Journal headlined "Amgen's Star Fades Amid Safety Questions." The story says Amgen has lost $20 billion in market cap after regulators placed a "black box warning" March 9 on labels of Amgen's amenia drugs including EPO. Amgen's CEO notes "that more than 50 studies show the anemia drugs are safe when used according to the label."

OK, one more question sans half-baked answer: "Does the EPO label list blood boosting for cyclists among the drug's recommended uses?"

Jan drivels, Basso quibbles

The organization representing UCI Pro Tour teams has called for all riders implicated in the Operation Puerto blood doping scandal to submit to DNA tests following former Tour de France champion Jan Ulrich having been conclusively linked to the scandal through such testing.

Ulrich says he's "blameless" in the whole affair and will tell his "version of the facts" in an upcoming memoir, "Bikes, Blow and Babes... the only reasons to ride." In the memoir, Ulrich says that if he really wanted that badly to win the Tour again he would have hired the guy who dresses up like the devil to kneecap Lance with a lead pipe after the 2001 stage to Alp d'Huez.

The other 2006 tour contender implicated in the scandal, Ivan Basso, also claims innocence and says he'll gladly submit to a DNA test. Providing that his DNA sample is submitted in connection to a judicial or national governing body's investigation led by Inspector Clouseau. Basso, however, didn't require the exhumation of slapstick genius Peter Sellers, which leaves the door open for Steve Martin to reprieve the role he fumbled in a 2005 remake.

On Saturday, Levi Leipheimer blew through the finish line at Copperopolis without stopping to sign a single autograph. On his way past the crowd lining the street Levi shouted over his shoulder, "Can't stop now, I've gotta find Steve."

Brave New World

I bumped into a story on velonews.com headlined "ProTour teams and (most) riders commit to DNA tests." The story is here. at the bottom of the column.

The story was both scary and encouraging. If the UCI creates a DNA bank for some of the world's best athletes, that's troubling to me. Over-analyzation is my default position, and while reading the story my mind drifted to the opening scene of Brave New World where the Director of Hatcheries and Conditioning leads students on a tour of the the fertilizing room. Of course right to privacy is the immediate issue for the riders, but whenever I read about DNA being stored for any purpose, I take logical leaps and I bound off in the direction of a Brave New World.

The encouraging part is what DNA testing can do for the sport. I can't imagine how a doctor's program could sneak past such scrutiny. Plus, DNA testing could hamper the peleton from using designer drugs that alter genes. Part of why I love cycling is because I can get on the road and compare myself to the professionals (quite dimly I must admit). But when I hit 40 mph in a sprint or take a pull on the front at 33 mph, I feel like, for that brief moment, I'm doing something the pros do. That feeling is motivating; it keeps me wanting to ride my bike and train harder; it helps me appreciate the beautiful spectacle that is bike racing. If I know the pros are all pharmaceutically enhanced, the feeling is diminished.

I guess since a Brave-New-World society where elitists lead a slack-jawed, happy and complacent middle class isn't inevitable, I'm for the DNA testing.

bike in the garage, front porch getting bigger

Tough day at work. Home in time to do an hour on the bike trail before dinner. Missed lunch, better eat first. Healthy food, hell no - corndog, make that two. Hmm, what to do whilst eating. Check on Vanderpoopie, he's always good. Ha, sucky things he sucks at, dude's funny. Read rest of that story about Tribune Co. selling to Sam Zell or to the team of Ron Burkle and Eli Broad. Either way both suitors propose leveraging the retirement accounts of Tribune employees so the employees, as a non-voting bloc, become the majority shareholder in the company. Huh? If the suitor sinks the ship the employees lose their retirement savings. I don't know. If I was a 30 year employee of the LA Times or Newsday or another Tribune subsid, I'd be wanting a back up plan before the big wigs seal that deal. Well, I digress, back to corndogs, bikes and my frontporch. Corndogs were delicious. Discipline needed to get on bike waning. Loosen the belt, my frontporch needs more room.